My Life as a Superhero (um, I Mean Single Mom)

I don’t think anyone ever starts out thinking, “when I grow up, I want to be a single parent…,” but one day, you wake up and find that is where you are. The road of life just takes you on an uncertain path. At least it did for me.

           
After what I fondly like to refer to as a series of unfortunate events, my marriage ended, and I found myself playing the role of Single Mom. Turns out our vows of “forever” lasted exactly eight years.

           
How I went from having a successful career, a beautiful home, a nice 401k savings, and financial security to traveling halfway across the country with my son, my dog, whatever clothes I could carry and $200 in my pocket, takes a precise mix of pain, suffering and unfortunate circumstances.

           
Now don’t get me wrong, this is not a sob story - just the opposite. I have this very stubborn way about me where I do not believe I can fail.

           
Yes, I know, I just mentioned my marriage failed, but it would have to take much more than that to make me ever believe for one tiny second that I would not be okay.

           
Was I scared? Heck yeah. I had $200, a three-year-old to feed, and don’t forget the dog. The dog… what was I thinking? See, there’s that stubborn streak again. No one was going to tell me I couldn’t pull this off, even with a skinny scared dog in tow.

           
Fast forward a few months. I now have a job making $8 an hour. That is a far cry from the six figure income I was making before, but I was appreciative all the same. Now, make that stretch to pay for full time day care, rent and, oh yeah, don’t forget the dog food.

           
Yes, those were my beginning months starting out as a single mom. The difficult path I traveled never once caused me a moment’s hesitation, though. I knew I could, and would, do everything I needed to take care of my son. After all, what are moms for?

           
I also always knew in the back of my mind that I would be successful again. A quote from a Tim Allen movie always rolls around in my head, “Never give up and never surrender.” And that’s what being a single mom is all about. There are no days off. Food will not fall from the sky to feed your children. You must persevere.

           
You must do it, one day at a time, one step at a time, one breath at a time. And, you know what, you’ll be okay. The world will not end. You will find the means for food and clothing. Do you know why? Because this is one of the super powers of being a single mom. The strength comes from the love and trust in your children’s eyes. Then one day you wake up and realize you did it all on your own.
           
I now run a successful multi-million dollar company and own a lovely beach cottage with a beautiful view of the sound. My son is happy, healthy and safe, and that darn dog is pretty happy, too!

Connie Nolter lives in Eastern North Carolina with her son, Ronan, and their dog, Gypsy. They enjoy spending any spare moment they can at the beach, playing Zelda together on Wii, and dreaming big.

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